Mon 14 Feb 2011
Ever find yourself in a relationship and you simply do not know what to say? Perhaps you truly have the desire to turn the argument around but just can’t get up the courage to reveal your vulnerability. Maybe you have apologized but your partner just doesn’t hear the apology as a true apology. Dr. Nancy Dreyfus has the perfect tool. Her latest book, Talk to Me Like I’m Someone You Love: Relationship repair in a flash, not only has an intriguing title but, it is an intriguing tool. The book itself is a series of over 100 flash cards that partners can use to stop arguing and start loving again.
I have used the cards myself and trust me, they are a miracle tool. When in the midst of an argument yes, it may take an extra minute to grab the book and find the appropriate card but the time not spent arguing outweighs that single moment and is certainly priceless.
So why do the cards work? The flash cards truly are gifts. Consider that when someone uses the flash cards, they are letting their partners know that they are interested in finding a resolution, believe the relationship is important, really want to be closer, and want to give more. This creates a tremendous shift in any relationship. The short messages in the book empower couples to end the arguments and come together in a powerful way.
Here are some of my favorite cards, ones I will certainly be using with my husband:
- This feels awful. Can we start again and really listen to each other?
- I am upset. This doesn’t mean that you are a bad person…It means that if you could just listen, I would feel incredibly loved.
- I don’t need you to see this exactly as I do. but I do need you to hear where I am coming from.
- When you talk to me that way, I just feel small.
- Right now, I don’t need a lecture, I need your love.
- I can see that I’ve missed the point. Please give me another chance.
- I realize I’m overreacting. Can you give me a minute to get sane again.
Dr. Dreyfus’ book is truly an extraordinary, innovative tool that can save marriages and even teach us all how we can communicate in a way where we are heard and loved. Personally, I am thrilled to have a copy of her book. It has been and will continue to be a powerful influence on my relationship with my husband. I think that all couples should, without a doubt, possess a copy! You can learn more about Dr. Nancy Dreyfus at www.NancyDreyfus.com. You can also purchase her book on Amazon.
Until March 1st, 2011, you can also listen in to an interview with Dr. Dreyfus. Simply register to listen at http://www.4healthinc.com/HealthyRelationshipBliss.aspx
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